Wondering how strong God really thinks that I am.

I hear all the time that God won't give us any more than we can handle.  Well, the truth is that I want to know how strong God thinks that I am.  I am about at my breaking point, and just don't think that I can handle another thing.  I'm also getting tired of people telling me that I'm such a strong woman, that I can keep going like this.  Truth is that I'm not that strong, and I really just want someone to put their arms around me, let me cry, and say "here, hon, why don't you let me carry this burden for you".  That's what I really want.  I don't see that happening any time soon, so I suppose that I'll just have to keep being strong, and getting myself through this stuff.  


I know that I have awesome friends and family who support me and love me, but there's something about having a special someone in your life who will hold you, and help to carry your burdens with you.  I'm missing that very much right now.  


Problems with my son have gotten worse...ER trip last night, that I didn't find out about until this afternoon, then had to deal with his C and Y caseworker, as well as this JPO, and then to cap it all off, we had Parent/Teacher conferences tonight.  Good news:  His teachers all like him, and think that he's a great kid, who is respectful of them, and is really smart.  Bad news:  He is absent a lot, AND doesn't turn in his work.  So, because of those 2 bad things, he's failing all of his classes EXCEPT for welding!  Go figure, the kid is a hands on learner.  So, long story short, he has A LOT of work to make up, and still may not pass this semester.  GREAT!


Found out today that our cat, who was living with soon to be ex's friend, passed away last week, and NO ONE told either Shayna or me.  That was heart breaking news, as we both LOVED that kitty.   As I think about this, I understand why he waited to tell us, with the funeral being last weekend.  It was still rough to get that news this evening on the way to my son's parent/teacher conferences.  


So, at this point, I guess that I'm just going to have to keep muddling through. Yes, I'll make it, if nothing else, I'm a survivor.  Always have been a survivor, always will be.  It's just rough having to do it all alone.